Kismet at the Austin Humane Society

Adoption Center
124 West Anderson Lane

Sometimes my life stories make better material for a French New Wave film than an uber-pink blog. Coincidences of the absurd seem deadset on making my life surreal. You know, existentialism and all that jazz.

Picture the below in images placed out of sequence and intercut with images of Brigitte Bardot writhing naked in the grass and some kid running for miles ...




A good friend of mine from Los Angeles moved to Houston where her boyfriend at the time lived. His name is Don Pascal. I met up with Don Pascal in Austin before I moved here and he introduced me to his cousin. After I moved here, I ended up going to a halloween party at his cousin's place where I didn't know anyone. As it turns out, many of the people at the party were somewhat homophobic members of some bible-lovin' group. Being a deviant fag hag and Catholic dropout, I didn't make any favorable impressions...
except for the impression I made on Don Pascal's cousin's girlfriend, Drea.


Drea had recently moved from Los Angeles to Austin and was absolutely loving it. Drea looks like Marisa Tomei... if Marisa Tomei was a bad ass. Since she's a former angeleno, I figured we'd have stuff in common. Like maybe we'd reminisce about how we both miss crazy-cheap manis and pedis.

Getting to know Drea, I've realized that I've been stalking her for years.

Sure she's younger than me. Sure she's a Bruin and I'm a Trojan... But, I've been inadvertanly following her around the States like a lil' lost puppy.

I've inadvertantly stalked people before. There was a two week period during which I saw John Ritter everywhere I went. I went to the bank; there he was. I went to Literati; there he was. I went to the grocery store; there he was. I went to my ob/gyn; there he was. Ok, maybe not the last one... but still. I saw that man everywhere and was actually thinking of asking him if he was stalking me. But then, I realized, that if one of us was going to stalk the other it would probably be me stalking him. So I realized that I might be stalking him. So, I stopped. Then, he died a week later.

Back to Drea. As it turns out, in the big ole city of Los Angeles, Drea moved to Sawtelle at Palms. Soon after, I moved right across the street from her apartment complex. Later on, she moved up to Purdue Ave. and Santa Monica Blvd. Not long after, I moved into the apartment building next door to her. We both used to go to the same nail salon. In any other area of any other city, that's so not a big deal. But in our hood, there were more Korean nail salons than there were gas stations. Something like 4-5 per block. The fact that we both frequented the same, but never met was a pretty weird coincidence.

It's like When Harry Met Sally. "We lived next door for years, but we never met."

Weird.

But not that weird.

Not Godard-weird.

Last night I was talking to Drea on the phone.

"Yo dog, whazzup?"

"actually, I got a dog"

"You adopted a dog?!?"

"Yeah! I just did."

"Oh, I'm sooo jealous. I can't wait to meet him"

"Mos def. You totally can come by anytime and we'll walk him"

"Where did you get him?"

"The Austin Humane Society"

"Oh, that's cool."

"Yeah, he's such a great dog"

"What's his name?"

"Fitz"

"Seriously?"

"Uh... yeah?"

"Wait... is he black?"

"Yeah..."

"and 2 1/2 years old?"

"...yeah..."

"and a lil' bit skinny, totally sweet, housetrained... and"

"what the fuck!?!"

"Dude. I met your dog!"

"...Wait... what? what are you talking about?"

"I totally walked your dog! Like a few weeks ago!!! I love Love LOVE him! I'm so happy he's yours now!"

So, I could try to explain away the ridiculousness of how I got to meet her dog before she did. I don't volunteer there. I don't plan on adopting a dog anytime soon. I have two cats who would greatly resent me if the thought even crossed my mind. And yet, I honestly, truly, did walk that wonderful dog a few weeks ago.

Yeah, I can tell you how I met him and why...

But doesn't it make it so much more interesting when there is no clear explanation?

Anyway... I am so happy for Drea and Fitz. He's a fan-freakin-tastic dog. Just a total sweetheart.

I know because I pre-screened him for her.

Before I even knew she was considering adopting a dog...




Oh... and if reading this reminds you of how much you love French New Wave stuff... Check out this kick ass production my friends at Yellowtape Construction Co. are putting on!
It's called I Am Not Tartuffe . You can hear them dishing it over on KUT. They are running it Thursdays through Saturdays at 8pm, March 15-31st at play!Theare (1204 Cedar Ave). And... if you bring your laptop, your snarky comments can be projected live on the stage for all to see.